Trenches

So once again I was reminded about the confusion and self destructive tendencies that I have or don't have. Sometimes I pretend that I copy people and look to others to understand acceptable practice but sometimes I think that is a lie I tell myself. But then the psychologist said something similar, but maybe that was because it's something I wanted him to think, but then I don't think that I have enough power over my mind, but then maybe I do... Confusion...
So the other day I had a deep and meaningful with a mate, they recalled our first interaction where I parroted some less than flattering information. With my memory blurring I can now recall the memory and have tried to put a spin on it that makes it not so rude and obnoxious. But that is beside the point, I felt gutted, feel gutted, even though I asked and recieved forgiveness. Did feel sick, like I'm hungry but I know I'm fed...
They also reminded me of another interaction with I mutual friend. I knew I was in the wrong, but I was acting on suggestions and desires of others friends. I didn't care but I tried super hard to care. Thinking back it reminded me of my mate who would try super hard to piss his friends off. Whether I knew it or not that was what I was doing.
I felt bad, incompetent, unfeeling and regretful. But God brings good out of evil. It's only day one but I have the feeling that once again God had given me a gift and taken away a temptation from me. It put things in perspective for my relationships and with God and his grace for every aspect of our lives. It gave me fear but also hope for the future. It reminded me that we don't change a huge deal throughout our lives, sometimes when I look at dad I see a twelve year old boy not a fifty year old father.
Changing tack and ignoring context, I had a few mates in school that I came off on the wrong foot but later we had great relationships. I don't remember initial contact, it gets blurred in my memory and fades unless someone rebuilds it.
Words.

An oceanic adventure

This post will be edited greatly most likely with what happened first but I wrote a post on the wrong blog and can't fix it from my phone. And I wanted to post something.

So this is a post about my goblin alchemist from the pirates of the shackles campaign. Currently he has a goblin run submarine, a bone anchor that can once a week supply a Skelton crew. He has a top hatted alter ego and is studying the necronomicon to become a lich. Unfortunately the campaign has been put on hold but we shall see what the future holds for GISH DA FIRE LORD!!!

Facepunch

I still don't know what I use facebook for. Now that I have a smartphone I seem to check it quite a bit, not so much so that I know what is happening to my friends but mostly because I feel the need to view each new post.

I have found in a few conversations that the status update serves the purpose of actual conversation and I think that is the main reason I use it for.

When I think I have an interesting story I feel the need to post it on Facebook. Sometimes I have already told a few people and other times I have been home alone and more likely to forget the story by the time I see someone.

The problem I find when I post things though is I am starting to get the strong feeling that I am a Kharmawhore, even though there is no Kharma on Facebook. I have noticed a few times that I have updated my status and kinda picked who of my friends will like it. I made the status because I knew they would like it, I suppose I could turn it around and say that they would not hear the story if I didn't post it but it still feels very unnatural.
That said I couldv'e posted this to Facebook but I figured because this gets less views I would be safe.

Been listening to a ton of Sufjan Stevens, he has quite a few Christmas songs and they are all very melodic, had it blasting from my Computer yesterday as I was cooking ANZAC biscuits and doing the dishes.

A chaotic Eddy

Weeks ago I told Raskal that I was planning on writing more blogs, as I could use it as my review process for my vicarage and it would be fun to write things down so I don't forget them... But I do not do the things I want to do...

But here we are, several weeks and many stories later I am making the first move. This is going to be a blog full of embellished stories, mediocre grammar and other musings which pertain to the chaotic state of my mind.

To make a start on this I will recount the events of the last weekend which was full of people and things.

The weekend started on Friday with chopping wood, so that our wood fire would keep us warm in the night whilst we had our doors open so the house wasn't stuffy. then I had to do two lots of dishes because I hadn't done them since making lasagna and ANZAC bikkies. then people started rocking up for the board games night and we talked for about an hour while the meat was cooking.

Board games were played, gatecrashers rocked up and Nerf guns were fired, by then it was 1:00. Then, like any sane people would, Jeff and I decided that we should go to Kmart and buy a scarf for a girls birthday. we had previously asked a mutual friend what would a good present be, she said a scarf... a nice blue one... So the quest for the blue scarf commenced.

We got to Kmart, all the scarfs were dodgy and cheap looking to our manly tastes so we rejected that train of thought and went to check out the Nerf guns, which due to the blue nature we decided would be an excellent gift for a woman of 30 odd years of age.

Woke up ~8 and had to go back to the shops to buy a scarf... because... found a blue fluffy one, happiness was found and we went home, Jeff to organise computer stuff for a church Garden event and myself to 20min of wrapping a present.

The Garden thing was educational, they told us that our veggie gardens should be pretty and not in rows, they proclaimed the apocalypse to all people and the need for or own veggie gardens. They spoke into my context with their message of plant symbiosis, recently playing the game REUS where that plays a large part.

the afternoon was non eventful, but the evening contained an enjoyable meal a non surprised party and a trip to the local drinking hole where drinking was not an activity. 10:30 arrived, then sleep, sermon, vegetation, sermon, facebook conversations, Peace and an early sleep.....

Time Using

So I had a conversation with Ben and I mentioned that I had done fanfictions of characters that I play, He suggested that I should put them on a blog much like he has done therefore the two previous posts. The first one was a D&D 4th ed character that I was playing, but we only had 3 sessions before we canned the campaign. and the second one is something I wrote up because I had to expand on the three leaders that my orc army has in an upcoming campaign. I was the first person to place my armies and so I had to have names and stats, as such I forwarded the following information to Davo.

Big Bad Warboss Skuzbag da Slow - Hex 26

- Black Orc Warboss on foot with Shield, and the Armour of Gork.

Boss Vorbash - Hex 35

- Black Orc Warboss on War Boar with Shield, Basha's Axe of Stunty Bashin', Talisman of Preservation and an Ironcurse Icon.

Boss Bishnak - Hex 15

- Orc Warboss on Wyvern with a Sword of Might, Enchanted Shield and Talisman of Endurance.

Unfortunately I did have have the time to properly give them names or think about their personalities. But then I encountered the problem of having to retroactively give them more back story. Thus I chose to write a fanfiction a term I found when trying to find out the titles that empire lords would use. I think I spent about half a day on the orcs and maybe two full days on Voadkyn, Voadkyn had a lot more research and thought.

I believe the time that I spent on these writings was Well Spent rather than Time Wasted. I also noticed that doing these things was one of the few times that my mind is totally absorbed into something, a phenomenon that never happens while doing assignments.

Blood in the Badlands

The account of Landsknecht Gordo Leichbart before Balthasar Zuchav, Earl of Lukovitch on his return from a skirmish against the new Incursion of orcs lead by Skuzbag the Slow.

B: Where are you men Landsknecht, and what happened to the glorious skill of the Landsknechte of The Open Plain

G: Well sir the orc inc....

B: No excuses now Landsknecht we hired you to collect information on the new incursion of Skuzbag the Slow, and the handsome amount that we are willing to pay will be more than enough for you to recoup your losses if it is as thorough as I am to believe..... It is very thorough is it not?

G: Yes sir

B: Carry on then.

G: Well sir we scouted the area around Mount Bloodhorn and caught sight of Vorbash and his Boar riders but they were far off and hunting down caravans so we journeyed on...

B: Go on

G: Well, after several days march through the mountains we caught sight of a wyvern scouting us, we assume with Bishnak on top, so we prepared for a battle. but nothing eventuated, we continued on until we found a Black Orc with a pet snotling smashing his axe into the side of the mountain. By our information this would be Skuzbag the Slow. We were hesitant to approach, suspecting a trap and just as we had prepared our weapons, the Skuzbag let out a horrific war cry...

B:...

G: Well the mountain erupted with Orcs and Goblins of all kinds, a group of black orcs swarmed to Skuzbag and hundreds of snotlings charged in front. Two savage orc shamans were seen chanting in a frenzied state and a group of orc BigUns with spear and shield charged into view. We held our ground but the orcs seemed happy to wait for us. As our group easily outnumbered them I called for a charge to destroy them. As we got closer the black orcs counter charged us with Skuzbag smashing through our ranks with the force of a steam tank. We were holding our own and gaining ground when I took a breath to marvel in the glories of Sigmar. But in the sky was not a vision of holiness but of a wyvern and two giant green hands holding a handful of squirming orcs and goblins. These handfuls were placed behind our ranks and fear gripped some of our units as screaming fanatics with a distinct  style smashed through our ranks. Our canoneers who had shot several shells into the black orcs to minimal effect then sought to have a last ditch effort at Bishnak on the wyvern before they were overrun by a group of spider riders.... I think I forgot to mention them...

B: No this is fine, your information is being extremely useful.

G: Oh, well this isn't even the interesting part, They got a straight shot off, a direct hit, I could have sworn that the ball was going right for him, but at the last second the ball disappeared in a puff of green smoke. On the horizon, I could see a massive Araknarok Spider and a green giant ambling towards us and I knew we should make a tactical withdrawal.

G: Well we cut through the enemy lines that barred our retreat slaying all that stood in our path with the biguns and black orcs taunting us as we fled. They did not lay a dedicated chase though and we thought our withdrawal successful. But before we had run a mile a huge dust storm clouded the horizon and I struggled to control my troops as the gutless weaklings broke rank. When I had called them back under control I called for my horsemen to make an escape and give a report of the battle while we made a distraction. A group of savage orcs flanked them in the dust and I saw several fine knights fall. I had given up on making a withdrawal and decided that my salvation would come through the blood of my enemies and my troop stood fast and met the enemy with passion and valour.

B: This story has come to an interesting conclusion, how are you here today if your troop made a valiant last stand I hope you will not presume to tell me that you singlehandedly destroy an entire orc war band.

G: Unfortunately no... I was captured and forced to watch as the green horde performed unimaginable acts of horror on my men. I saw boar riders pull my captains apart and orc archers pepper the injured with arrows. I saw snotlings feed mushrooms to my men, mushrooms that turned them green AND MADE THEIR GUTS EXPLODE FROM WITHIN....... @##&*&@#&*    @#&@#$&*    *&@#& .......I'm sorry sir I will contain my anger

B:...

G: Well the Black orc war boss stood before me and confirmed our suspicions that they had congregated together in an effort to control the flying fastness, but he also corrected some of our previous information showing them to be greatly underestimated.....  It turns out the both Skuzbag and Vogash had been black orcs in Grimgor's immortals but they had been left behind when a cavern had collapsed on them. There was quite an argument between the orcs over this, it seems that Skuzbag thought that it was the rocks who were attacking him and Vorbash thought it was the dwarves who had sabotaged the tunnel. Oh and Skuzbag's title is not the slow but rather the... Ahem... Skuzbag RokSmasha Da Destroya O RokFings... heh, and Vorbash is.... Vorbash FaceMuncha Da Fasterer ..., which he explains, is because he is faster than the flying fastness. I was also privy to information concerning  Bishnak ..... Bishnak Skypuncha Da Circus Masta... it seems that he is an orc who has taken a fondness to collecting various different creatures which is shown by the mottled nature of his army, the Araknorok and the giant are his it seems, though Skuzbag said that they were going to borrow them a bit.

G: I also collected some information concerning the captains. Rakrak NoseBittah leads a group of savage orc boar riders with dual weapons for Vorbash. It was these orcs who slew my knights. Badzag GutStabba is the captain of Skuzbag's Big Uns all armed with spear and shields. I believe there to be a special group of fanatics but as the goblins are very secretive about them I was unable to find out anything more, I also heard some squigs but they might have just been for food.

B: well this information has been wonderfully precise and I thank you for offering your life and the lives of your men for the benefit of the empire, you will be sufficiently rewarded for your trouble and I can replenish the core of your mercenary troops from my reserves. Once again thank you for your service.

Here ends the account of the meeting between Landsknecht Gordo Leichbart before Balthasar Zuchav, Earl of Lukovitch

Yes, the footnotes worked

Greetings my fellow brother in the search for true lore,

      I have here compiled a brief understanding of a character of interest for both you and I. the Character in question is of course Voadkyn the werewolf. I hope the following information comes to you in good stead with your own research and creates mirth where there might not have been.

      As always, birth is a good beginning and for Voadkyn this occurred in Moonwood[1] to a werewolf[2] tribe of the "People of the Black Blood."[3] Voadkyn received his name from an elder who had travelled to Cold Wood and met the local inhabitants - Voadkyns[4] -tree giants known for their dislike of jovial behaviour and preference for brooding and silence.

      Voadkyn exhibited the traits of his namesake not willingly joining in the play-fights of his brothers and often throwing fights organised by the tribes. Wary of the spotlight he preferred to remain in the shadows. When it was revealed that his lycanthropic nature was playing second fiddle to the Tuathan[5] blood in his veins the tribe was all too happy to comply.

      Despite his more passive shape change forms, the tribe did not disown him and welcomed the fruits of his hunting. Voadkyn had an unnatural endurance and could remain motionless for days with his longbow ready, waiting for the opportune time to strike.

      He would have lived out the rest of his days in the same way if not for a travelling priestess of Malar. While his tribe were devout followers of Malar, they rarely had contact with a priest or priestess. This lack of contact had let Voadkyn and his longbow slip through a crack. While they themselves did not use bows or ranged weapons, the tribe did not condemn Voadkyn for doing so. This was rectified when the travelling priestess announced that the tribe would celebrate the High Hunt[6] and chose Voadkyn to be the mark due to his heretical hunting style." Taste the blood of those you slay, and never kill from a distance."[7]

      Using a combination of stealth and traps Voadkyn easily escaped the bloodthirsty werewolves his tribe had become. Knowing that he was therefore exempt from further High Hunts and the unlikeliness that the priest chose him in the first place, Voadkyn asked for a prized tribal Carrikal. The carrikal has immense significance for the tribe as it was made from the jawbone of one of the tribe's great leaders. Voadkyn then vowed to make his kills as bloody as the jagged weapon would allow, uphold the tribal law and hold to the teachings of Malar.

      However, it was not long before he could feel the piercing eyes of his fellow tribe-members and their jealousy that a runt would receive such an esteemed weapon. A tribal outcast was a bad thing to be in werewolf territory but that was what Voadkyn found himself becoming. One day whilst hunting a quarry, that would create respect in the eyes of his tribe and Malar, he went beyond his tribe's border. Losing his quarry despite a hunt that made Malar proud, Voadkyn's Tuathan blood cried out to continue. To continue the hunt of prey unknown in lands unknown. At this turn of events, the night that had always been Voadkyn's friend began to bear its fangs. As Voadkyn continued he heard the howls of wolves in the air and saw the shadows move with images of ghostly wolves, the tribe was hunting him.

      Running from a tribe that he continued to see in the shadows and following the wonder-lust of his Tuathan blood he ventured towards civilisation. When Voadkyn first encountered the creatures known as sheep, he was pleasantly surprised that such a dumb animal existed for his consumption. Unfortunately, simple dogs or farmers with sticks (not much of a challenge for a werewolf runt who had mastered his shape-changing and stealth techniques) often guarded the sheep. The adventurers that soon followed proved to be more difficult. Nevertheless, the equipment they possessed was an adequate reimbursement. Thus too was Voadkyn's life until arriving in Moonstair.  

      In Moonstair Voadkyn heard the summons to create an adventuring party. The goal was to investigate strange disappearances in the surrounding forest. While the mayor was apparently clueless to the contributing forces to Voadkyn's keen senses there was the smell of undeath. For the Voadkyn's tribe, who revelled in blood and the thrill of the hunt, the scourge of the undead was an unnecessary evil that would be best back in the ground. The possible sojourn to the fey-world solidified the deal; a chance to return to the land of his ancestors was an unmissable opportunity. However, this sojourn to the undead-tainted fey-world had an unforeseeable side effect for Voadkyn. The taint on the land attached itself to Voadkyn making a shadowy character literally shadowy.[8]

     

      Now this story has not yet reached a conclusion, and using my vast unknowable powers I have seen into Voadkyn's soul. I have seen his wishes and desires, what he hopes to attain in the short and long-term, such information that I am willing to share with you for your reading pleasure. Voadkyn is currently choosing to continue with this adventuring party confident that he can disappear into the shadows should things go awry. He is reluctantly optimistic that this party, this tribe can and will protect its members should or when his past life catches up to him. Until that time it seems that Voadkyn will continue to train his stealth techniques, master his bloodthirsty fighting style, all the while stretching his legs for the inevitable time when again he will be on the run.[9]

P.S.  I have yet to research the particular tribe that Voadkyn was born into or even the fate of his sires, as I am sure that you would be better able to find information on such topics. A clarification should be made into the reason why Voadkyn runs. I for one have not found any evidence that his tribe is actually hunting him. I am currently entertaining the possibility that his mind is simply creating these fantasies as result of worshiping his bloodthirsty deity and the guilt that often accompanies those fellows who seek paths of evil rather than good.

P.P.S       If any clarification needs to be made please write me and I will be hasty to respond.

Your friend, the one writing this letter

---

[1] http://forgottenrealms.wikia.com/wiki/Moonwood

[2] Werewolves have the shape-changer sub-type however, as a Tuathan I do not. Can I? If I did then I should probably also be allergic to silver, or maybe because I am a runt I did not pick-up that weakness. Another awesome feature of lycans is that they are bearers of disease, that would be another one of those little perks that I love adding to my characters :P

[3] http://forgottenrealms.wikia.com/wiki/People_of_the_Black_Blood

[4] http://forgottenrealms.wikia.com/wiki/Voadkyn

[5] Tuathans are born with fey blood however they are not qualified as fey. Can I be?

[6] http://forgottenrealms.wikia.com/wiki/High_Hunt

[7] http://forgottenrealms.wikia.com/wiki/Malar

[8] Haunting shade [multiclass skill] changes my origin to shadow, having written this footnote last it might be that you can only have one origin, if in the case this is true then I don't really need to have the fey Origin as well. Because I can't :P

[9] Paragon path (Intrepid Scout)